Cast: Cameron Diaz (2), Matthew Morrison (3), Jennifer Lopez (4), Rodrigo Santoro (5), Elizabeth Banks (6), Ben Falcone (7), Anna Kendrick (8), Chace Crawford (9), Brooklyn Decker (10), Dennis Quaid (11), Chris Rock (12), Thomas Lennon (13), Rob Huebel (14), Amir Talai (15), Rebel Wilson (16), Joe Manganiello (17)
(Watch the trailer)
My favourite quotes - "End of the day, family's all that matters. Not the races and the trophies and the endorsements. Not the money and the women, and the sex and the drugs, and partying with Jimmy Buffett at the back of Willie Nelson's bus. None of that means jack shit when I'm gone. But you guys, my kids, that's all we really leave behind.", "There's no such thing as ready. You just jump on a moving train and try not to die.", "Dude, you're gonna be fine. You just got to get over your fear of babies. They can smell fear, like bears or wives.", "You just don't get it do you? We love being dads. When I was young, I used to think I was so happy. But now I know I'm happy. Exhausted, but happy. I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.", & "You don't know true love until you wipe someone's butt."
Did You Know? - The film is based on a self-help book of the same name written by Heidi Murkoff and Sharon Mazel.
In the past month, whenever I could spare the time in between my own work commitments, I've been on an 'Emma' binge with posts like We Can Fly Away (Emma Townshend), Aquamarine (Emma Roberts), and The Perks Of Being A Wallflower (Emma Watson). My baby cousin Emma turns 1 month old today and my uncle held her 'man yue' celebration over the weekend. But we Chinese have a special way of celebrating a baby's one month (man yue) celebration. If you're confused, think of 'man yue' as a Chinese version of the Western baby shower.
When a baby turns one month old, according to traditional Chinese customs, parents hold a party to celebrate the baby's first full moon (man yue). It is when both mother and baby are formally introduced after the end of the mother's confinement period. Part of the customs include the giving of red eggs and traditional cakes called ang ku kueh (a red glutinous cake with peanut fillings), shaving the baby's head (some people even shave off the baby's eyebrows), and selecting a Chinese name for the baby. Guest attending the celebrations give gifts of jewellery to baby girls and ang baos (red packets with money inside). If you want to know more about these interesting traditions, read about it here.
Truth be told, this year has been a year of many babies. Well, for me at least. in the last 4 months, there has been so much talk of babies around me.
Baby #1 - My friend and colleague, Gurmit, has a new baby girl named Mikeala (born February 26). Baby #2 - My little cousin Emma was born on 9th April. And Baby #3 will arrive any time now, in the month of May. Because another friend and colleague of mine, Alaric, is going to become a father to a baby boy. The baby's intended name starts with an 'E' too - Elijah. Actually, the name Elijah reminds me of the vampire featured in the television series The Vampire Diaries and new series The Originals. On top of that, I have a friend who is trying for a baby.
So for months now I've been wanting to write about my thoughts on the film What To Expect When You're Expecting.
What To Expect When You're Expecting was based on a pregnancy guide of the same name. I knew about the book even before the film was ever conceived because I used to work at the Children & Lifestyle department at the Kinokuniya in town so I know the book. I know it's cover and weight all too well actually. I had to shelve boxes and boxes of them! Needless to say, it was a very popular book for mums to be. So how does one turn a self-help book into a film with a storyline? Much like the film He's Just Not That Into You I guess - create an ensemble film. And with any ensemble film, you like some of the stories and characters but probably not all of them.
In What To Expect When You're Expecting, we encounter 5 couples with various concerns about having children and parenting. And it covers various possible scenarios. There's Wendy & Gary, a couple trying hard to get pregnant, and that story is tied in with the concept of step-families and parenting styles with Skyler & Ramsey. Then there's Rosie & MArco, a couple who get pregnant after a one night stand and, to add to that complicated mess, also go through a miscarriage. Also, there's Holly & Alex, a couple who adopt because they can't have kids. Which leads to my favourite characters in the film - The Dudes. And the film also talks about the concerns and issues a couple faces when expecting a baby through couple number 5 Jules & Evan.
Elizabeth Banks and Ben Falcone as Wendy & Gary
Brooklyn Decker and Dennis Quaid as Skyler & Ramsey
Wendy: Ga!
(Wendy's iPhone app shows a flashing sign with the words "You are ovulating" with Tarzan-like sound effects)
Gary: Yeah?
Wendy: Ha!
Gary: Oh. Shoo...
Wendy: 2 minutes.
Gary: I gotta go.
Wendy: Honey.
Gary: Honey I gotta go. I got...
Wendy: Honey.
(Wendy gives Gary a look and he relents)
Wendy: Janice!
Janice: Yeah?
Wendy: I'm taking Gary in the back.
Like Wendy & Gary, a friend of mine wants to start a family with her husband. Now Wendy & Gary have been at it for 2 years, but my friend and her husband haven't been trying very long. It's funny cos even before watching, What To Expect When You're Expecting, my friends and I have already been talking about how there are apps that tell you when you're ovulating. So seeing an app pop up in the film really tickled me. Plus, this early scene between Wendy and Gary tells us a lot of the dynamics of their relationship.
Gary: Oooh... what do you got?
Wendy: Some wine, cheese and crackers, your favourite.Gary: Oh that's a real treat. So what's the movie anyway?
Wendy: Dirty Dancing.
Gary: Oh... alright. That's a good one.
Wendy: Um-hmm.
Gary: Yeah. Whoa... what are you...?
Wendy: I would like to propose a toast.
Gary: Okay... But you, you haven't had a drink in 2 years.
Wendy: I just... I think we should take a break from trying. Just be us for a while.
Gary: Alright. I'll drink to that. Sure.
Wendy: To us. And if that doesn't work, we'll do 3 rounds of IVF. And if that doesn't work, we'll just adopt, which will be great cos I have no fears, genetic or otherwise. To us.
Gary: To not snuffing out the flame.
Wendy: Okay.
Gary: Okay. What are you doing? Oh my God. You're gonna... Are you going to go for it? You're going for it. You did it. You just... You just... You crushed it. You crushed a glass of wine.
Wendy: Oh my God I'm wasted.
Gary: Yeah. I bet you are.
Wendy: It's so good. Why have I wasted 2 years not drinking this?
Another friend of mine went through a lot to get pregnant. And she would get really sad each month when she had her monthly period, it was proof that she wasn't pregnant, even though they were seeing a doctor about it. After a while, they stopped the treatments and surprise, surprise, they got pregnant! Just like Wendy & Gary. So perhaps the point is that even when you're trying hard to get pregnant, you mustn't forget to have fun and not make the process of trying for a baby such a chore. I guess there's a reason why there's having sex, and there's making love.
Making a baby should be a product of love, maybe that's how the phrase 'making love' came about.
So now you're pregnant. What next? Parenting. I think besides the thought of the pain of child birth, the thought of raising a child scares me to death. I don't need a film to put me off having kids, I'm already apprehensive. My friends tell me that I feel this way because I'm single and that when I find someone I want to spend the rest of my life me, I'd feel differently. Well tell that to Sandra Oh's Dr Cristina Yang from the television series Grey's Anatomy.
Ramsey: Just get it off your chest son.
Gary: I'm sick of competing with you okay.
Ramsey: That's it. Just keep going. I'm listening.
Gary: You named me Gary Cooper for Christ's sake.
Ramsey: Get it all out.
Gary: You're the reason that I got fat. You are the reason I got fat!
Ramsey: Whoa! Ouch. That hurts! Slow down. Stop. Really? I guess I've made kind of a shit-sandwich in the old dad department huh? I saw every episode of your 'Lose It' season and I have the whole thing on DVD, Blu Ray. And sometimes, I stay up at night and I watch it over and over again.
Gary: Really?
Ramsey: Yeah. This is hard for me. But there's something that I really want to tell you.
Gary: Okay dad.
Ramsey: Beat me home, we'll never have to race again.
Gary: God damn it! This is not good parenting! I'm gonna beat you! You're ridiculous!
Raising a child is no easy feat. When I see how spoilt and naughty some children can be and how their parents handle them, I really question their parenting abilities. Then I stop myself and try not to judge. Because what if one day, my kid becomes like theirs. I have a great fear of becoming a bad parent. A parent that will be judged by her child's bad behaviour.
Is there a right or wrong way to raise your child? I don't know yet. Maybe when I've got grown kids of my own and they turn out okay I'd be able to comment on that question. But if I do marry and have kids, I am a firm believer of the phrase 'Spare the rod, spoil the child'. Although I have never been canned by my parents ever, and I think I turned out descent, I do feel that my parents didn't spoil me rotten. When my mum says 'No', no matter how many times you beg or try to get her to change her mind, 'No' means 'No'.
Wendy: I'm sorry. I just... I didn't think about any of this stuff before I got pregnant. You know. I er... I just wanted the glow. The one that they promise you on the cover of those magazines with the pretty lady, looking down at her perfectly round belly with that sweet smile. Well... I'm calling it. I'm calling bullshit. I'm calling bullshit on the whole thing. Pregnancy sucks. Making a human being is really hard. I have no control over my body or my emotions. Care bear, I'm sorry. All I want to do is punch you in the face. But I love you so much so I don't mean it.
Gary: I love you too squeaks. You're doing great.
Wendy: I don't know about you. But I didn't get the glow. I just got back ache. And er... hemorrhoids. Have you ever seen those? Don't do it. Don't take the mirror down there. And then I have these purple stretch marks everywhere and pressure hanging from my uterus that makes me walk like I was kicked in the vag. I just...
Janice: Okay. Maybe it's time to stop there.
Wendy: Too far.
Janice: That's the end.
Wendy: It's just I couldn't think of another way to describe it.
Janice: That was really good.
Wendy: So...
Janice: There we go.
Wendy: Thank you. They say when it's all over, you forget the whole thing. And I for one really hope that's true. (Wendy farts) Like that. I really hope I forget that.
Janice: Wendy Cooper everybody.
Before you go get pregnant, think long and hard whether a child is what you want. And whether you want to be responsible for raising a child. Because "making a human being is really hard". It's pretty amazing isn't it? How much a mother can endure to for her child. A lot of people think and worry about the pain of labour. But for some, labour pains isn't the only beating your body takes. As always, different people have different experiences with pregnancy. I guess Elizabeth Banks' Wendy Cooper got the short end of the stick.
Wendy: OOHHHH.... GA...
Gary: Yeah?
Wendy: I changed my mind. I want the epidural. I want it Ga.
Gary: No no honey.
Wendy: Yup.
Gary: No no no...
Wendy: Yes.
Gary: You said you didn't want it. And you said that even if you did ask for it that that would just be the crazy talking...
(Wendy slaps him)
Gary: Oh....!
Wendy: Gary! Get me the juice.
Gary: That seemed a little crazy. I will get you the juice. Yeah.
Wendy: I need it Ga.
Gary: Yeah. Uh-huh.
Wendy: I'm sorry baby. Just don't come back without it okay.
During Emma's 'man yue' celebration, my aunts started talking about going into labour and whether they had a Caesarean or went for natural birth, or how long they were actually in labour for. Now that conversation freaked me out. I am now terrified of having kids. And I said so in front of them after hearing their stories. But my mum said that my brother and I were very easy births and only took 3 to 4 hours at most to come out. So she said I didn't have to worry because I'd be like her and have it easy. Well, when I have kids, I'll tell you if I agree on her theory or not.
Maybe its because I don't have kids. But at the moment, while I want a family of my own, I'm not too sure about having kids right now. Maybe my friends are right, when I find someone I love, maybe I'd want to have kids. I mean, who doesn't want that glow right?
"I finally found it. He's my glow. He's my perfect, perfect glow."
- Wendy Cooper
Elizabeth Banks was fantastic in this film! Although her character Wendy can be really grating on the nerves, Elizabeth Banks played her in a way that made her both intense yet rather adorable. And I love the chemistry between Elizabeth Banks and Ben Falcone. The characters Skyler & Ramsey really didn't make a big impression on me but I have to admit it was really fun watching Dennis Quaid play Ramsey. His cheeky and competitive streak was a little over the top, but still very fun to watch.
Jennifer Lopez and Rodrigo Santoro as Holly & Alex
Wendy & Gary were able to get pregnant eventually. But there are some couples who can't. And this subject is covered in the film as well. Meet Holly & Alex.
Alex: You lost the one steady gig and you didn't even tell me? Are you kidding me?
Holly: I know. I'm sorry. I was just trying to get something else before you noticed.
Alex: Right.
Holly: So it'd be like 'Hey I got some new jobs' and not 'Holy shit! We can't afford our life'. You know I know you've been so worried about saving and the house...
Alex: Yeah, but we're in this together. Here I am, trying to get ready for something that's gonna be...
Holly: Oh my God!
Alex: What?
Holly: I knew it! You... You're not even ready?
Alex: Look, I'm not like you okay. I can't just look at a picture and feel some magical bond. And you lying to me isn't helping.
Holly: Look, I know okay.
Alex: Yeah.
Holly: I screwed up.
Alex: You did.
Holly: I just... I... I just couldn't handle another thing being my fault. Okay. I'm the one with the bad eggs. I'm the one who made us spend the 401k money on IVF. And I'm the one who can't do the one thing that a woman is supposed to be able to do.
Alex: Holly. Stop. Stop.
Holly: You don't even want this do you?
Alex: I never said that.
Holly: Not out loud.
From my friend's personal experience, I know that IVF isn't cheap. And it doesn't always work. But what if you really, really want kids. Actually, it's not that I never want to have kids, its just the thought of labour that really scares me to death. So maybe if I could afford it, I wouldn't mind adopting kids. But with adoption, I'm sure there's a whole different set of issues that one might face with adoption.
Alex: That's the one thing you can count on with adoption right? Time. I need that time. To save. To get ready.
Vic: There's no such thing as ready. You just jump on a moving train and try not to die.
Alex: Argh. Great.
I love what Vic, the leader of the Dudes, says to Alex as he freaks out about the adoption - that "There's no such thing as ready. You just jump on a moving train and try not to die."
I've heard that the 9 months before the baby actually arrives gives the parents time to adjust to the big change that's about to happen in their lives. And the 9 months also gives both mother and father time to bond with the unborn child. Mothers feel their babies kick, and fathers watch as the product of their love grows inside the belly of their wives. So I guess Alex's meltdown is pretty understandable.
But I think his fear stems from the fact that he doesn't know if he's gonna be a good father or how to be one. I too dislike the unknown. Uncertainty is not my thing. And not knowing what lies ahead makes me nervous. But that's life isn't it. There no sure thing in the world. Anything can happen. Just do the best you can. Love the best way you know how.
Alex: It's not that I'm not ready. I'm just... I'm scared.
Holly: I know. Okay. I'm scared too. I don't know what the hell I'm doing. But we can be scared together.
Alex: Yeah.
Holly: We just have to jump in.
Alex: Right.
Holly: All in.
Alex: I know. I'm getting there. And I know I'm gonna love him cos I love the hell out of his mum. Let's go meet our son.
Holly: Okay.
Truthfully, the word 'adoption' always reminds me of Angelina Jolie. But she's not the only celebrity to adopt. Madonna, Sandra Bullock, Katherine Heigl, Jamie Lee Curtis, they've all adopted children as well.
Holly & Alex's storyline contains the film's most touching scene. When Holly finally meets and holds the baby she's always wanted, that scene made me a little weepy when I first watched the film. Jennifer Lopez really did a good job as Holly. In fact, in the film The Back-Up Plan, Jennifer Lopez also acted as a woman who really wanted a baby of her own.
Anna Kendrick and Chace Crawford as Rosie & Marco
It's not that easy to get pregnant, ask Wendy & Gary, they'll tell you its not as easy as you think to get pregnant. And for some, like Holly & Alex, they can't have their own children and turn to adoption to become parents. But for Rosie & Marco, all it took was 1 night of unprotected sex.
Firstly, I have to say that Anna Kendrick and Chace Crawford, in my opinion, is the best looking couple in What To Expect When You're Expecting. Okay, okay, Holly & Alex come really close as well but still, I like the pairing of Anna Kendrick and Chace Crawford more. I've only watched a few episodes of Gossip Girl and don't really know Chace Crawford's acting range. I didn't expect much, so I was very and pleasantly surprised by his performance in the film as Marco. Anna Kendrick, on the other hand, I've noticed for a while now. I loved her in the film Pitch Perfect and 50/50, so I was really looking forward to see how she'll hold her on in an ensemble piece.
Marco: Hey! What do you think you're doing?
Rosie: There's a line if you want to order.
Marco: The only thing I'm ordering is for you to stop serving bacon. Okay. Pigs are turf.
Rosie: Oh my God. Your turf?
Marco: Yeah.
Rosie: Is this West Side Story? Are we going to rumble at midnight?
Marco: You know what? Maybe I got a whole gang of backup dancers just ready to go.
Rosie: Oh wow!
Marco: Okay, you're the cheese truck, so stick to cheese.
Customer: Can I order now?
Marco: NO! Just give me one second please.
Rosie: That's funny. Cos I noticed that those jalapeño fritters that you guys are serving...
Marco: Are awesome right? They're my invention. I made them.
Rosie: They have ricotta cheese in them.
Marco: Oh come on. That's like a little bit of cheese. It's nothing compared to the bacon crutch you're propping these sandwiches up on.
Rosie: They're paninis. They're grilled peach and blue cheese paninis with a dash of bacon. Also awesome. Also my invention.
Marco: Alright you wanna go, let's go. Your special against my special. Whoever sells the most tonight wins.
Rosie: Fine.
Marco: Fine. Alright if I win, you have to have a drink with me. And if you win, you may have 3 drinks with me.
Rosie: That's cute. So you can stand me up again. No thank you.
Marco: That was like 5 years ago. But that's sweet that you still remember that. I'm, I'm impressed Rosie. I'll see you in the field alright.
Rosie: It doesn't keep me up nights!
Marco: Sure.
I could watch Anna Kendrick and Chace Crawford flirt all day. I really love the way we first meet their characters Rosie & Marco. But I digress. Now with Rosie & Marco, they're a young couple who have to deal with getting pregnant after a one night stand. They decide to stay together and see the pregnancy through and truth be told, its a pretty common tale.
I know of quite a number of friends who got married because they had a baby on the way. When a child is the reason that brings 2 people together, it complicates things doesn't it? What To Expect When You're Expecting is a film about pregnancy, so I guess abortion is not an option. But with Rosie & Marco's storyline, it gives me the chance to think about the subject. As a Catholic I should be anti-abortion. However, if I were faced with the same situation Rosie & Marco are faced with in the film, I really wouldn't know what I'd do.
I can say that I will keep the baby, but when it really happens will I really keep it? I don't know, and maybe I'll never know the answer to that question. But one thing's for sure, if you are faced with the exact same situation as Rosie & Marco, you really need to ask yourself the right questions. Marriage should be a lifetime commitment. And raising a child IS a lifetime commitment. Are you ready for marriage? Are you marrying for the right reasons? Are you ready to bring a life into this world and care for the child? Will you be a good parent to the child? These are very important questions. And you need to find the answers to these questions first before moving ahead with any decision.
Marco: Well erm... Okay... Are you sure you took the test right?
Rosie: You pee on a stick. It's idiot proof.
Marco: No I know. It's just... one time.
Rosie: Yup.
Marco: So... What do you want to do?
Rosie: I don't know. What do you want to do?
Marco: I don't know. I just found out. Okay. You're the girl, don't you get to decide?
Rosie: Great, great. So then it's all on me?
Marco: No I... No I didn't mean... Oh shit! Should we get married?
Rosie: Shit should we get married. Yeah... No it's just when you put it like that, that's...
Marco: Oh, I'm sorry Rosie well I'm just trying to do the right thing here. I didn't mean to..
Rosie: Then don't ask the wrong questions. I... just erm... forget that I said anything. Just forget it cos I'll figure it out. Like whatever it is, it's not your problem. So...
Marco: Rosie...
Rosie: It's fine. I have to get back to the truck anyway.
Rosie miscarries early in the pregnancy and she distances herself from Marco after she loses the baby. Truthfully, I feel that Rosie & Marco's story is not given enough weight for such a serious topic. And Rosie just saying "I'll have another chance when the time's right" as the resolution to their storyline really doesn't do it justice. But that's gonna always be the problem with ensemble pieces isn't it? The lack of time to do each storyline justice.
Marco: If you want me to go, I'll go.
Rosie: What happened to your hand?
Marco: Look, I just want you to know that I get it. I'll probably never really understand what you went through. But I don't want that to be the reason we're not together. Okay you were right. I never even took you out on a real date. But I want to. Er... made these for you. Caramels. Piece of shit double boiler.
Rosie: I thought you said never again.
Marco: I made an exception.
Rosie: Urm... Marco the reason we're not together has nothing to do with the fact that we were gonna have a baby. It wouldn't have worked anyway.
Marco: That's bullshit Rosie. Give me one good reason.
Rosie: Okay... You don't have a car.
Marco: What? Says the girl with the duct taped Civic. Seriously?
Rosie: Okay fine it's not the car. You got me.
Marco: Well then what Rosie? What? Cos we were great.
Rosie: You know, you have the worst taste in girls. You go for the most obvious, least interesting chef groupies ever. What does it say about me if that's what you're into?
Marco: Well they can't all be you now can they?
Rosie: You want to know what it is?
Marco: Yeah.
Rosie: Every time I look at your face it kills me okay. Is that enough of a reason? Can we be done with this conversation please?
Marco: Well yeah. Can be done.
Rosie: Here.
Marco: No. My caramels. Just keep them. Take them.
Rosie: Fine.
